Are You Friggin' Kidding Me?

One Bostonian's Misadventures in Dating

So what’s going on, anyway?


Alright, so this week has just been absolutely nuts. Anyway, let’s rewind to last Thursday, the night before Bag Buddy decided to drop the bomb on me. 

I got a text from MMM. Really? After what, 2-3 weeks? Basically it was just “Hey, just wanted to say hi and see how you’re doing. Have you heard about going to Spring Training yet?”

I kinda blew it off for a few hours and then responded very plainly “Hey, things are alright. No word yet, hopefully I’ll know soon.”

So yea. I was like, really dude? You’re going to wait forever to text me and you choose to NOW when things with Bag Buddy are good?

Yea, then Bag Buddy decided that we weren’t doing anything.

Then I texted MMM to ask if he was still interested in hanging out. A few days later, he got back to me, saying yes as long as things were casual and that he was just too busy to get serious. I agreed, since my schedule is completely NUTS right now. So there’s that.

Meanwhile, Monday, I had to face Bag Buddy at the gym. I thought that I was good and over it, until he walked in when I was jump roping. Luckily there were enough people in class that I could kinda hide in the crowd and/or be kept busy by talking to someone else in class. I just felt uneasy and didn’t know how I wanted to react around him. I was “over” it all, but I was still hurt. After class, I had a 5 minutes “meh” moment where I thought about taking time off from the gym, but then snapped out of it when a new kid at the gym told me that I was really good and asked to trade numbers for some music stuff.

It then got me to realize that I just really missed Bag Buddy as my friend. It wasn’t like there were crazy feelings since it was only for 2 weeks, so we could repair this friendship.

I texted him the next morning, asking if he had time to talk that evening. He said he’d call me after his workout. I ended up texting him late since I hadn’t heard from him (which is RARE. When he says he’ll call, he’ll call. Always.) and he texted back a little bit later saying he had fallen asleep after work and asked if we could talk the next day- “unless you really need to talk now, then we can talk”. (It looks pretentious when it’s out of context, but it was meant to be sweet). I told him we could wait, but that I had a meeting the next night and wouldn’t be free until late, again. He then called me and I could tell he had been sleeping. He told me that he knew it was important that we talk (he didn’t know WHY I was wanting to talk, just that I wanted to) so he wanted to make time for me, but I told him that it was okay if he was sleeping. I could wait another day.

The next night I was in this meeting until FOREVER and he started calling me around 930. I texted him, saying that I would call him as soon as I got out. I did call him and we had a great chat.

I told him that I missed him as my friend and that it really sucked at the gym on Monday when I couldn’t talk to him. Well, I COULD, but I didn’t and it didn’t feel good. I also told him that I still would like to spend 1 on 1 time together, not romantically, but just to hang out. I told him that he’s my closest friend at the gym (aside from the BFF) and would like us to get to know each other better. He agreed and said we could make plans soon.

So now I’m just looking forward to hugging my friend and just having things go back to normal. However, I have a feeling that these feelings will resurface in one way or another, but we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.

And as for MMM- My hero Ronda Rousey stated that “sex is important for the female fighter” and that she likes to have sex as often as she can before a fight to boost her testosterone level. So I guess if I’m going to be serious about boxing and Muay Thai, I should keep MMM around, even if it’s just “casual” for now. 😉


Author: Jane Champagne

I'm a single late 20s chick, living in Boston. I go on a lot of horrible dates, but some good ones, too.

4 thoughts on “So what’s going on, anyway?

  1. Isn’t it always so crazy how men ALWAYS manage to show back up in your life in one way or another?? I think you have the right idea with Bag Buddy on just hanging out as friends and dealing with feelings later when they inevitably show up. Maybe this time around, he’ll have his stuff figured out. I also like your hero’s idea of keeping MMM around, even if it’s just for casual purposes. 😉

    • Yea, MMM will satisfy casual purposes for now. 😉

      And Bag Buddy- it’s going to come back up, I know it. I mean, he DOES like me. I DO like him. There are real feelings flying around- he’s just too scared, insecure, and not ready right now. I’m sure that once I start seeing someone he’ll feel differently about our situation. Or when he starts dating another stupid 20 year old and wonders why she’s not working out….he’ll regret letting me go for now. He’s such a great guy and deserves a great girl- but only when he’s ready will I ever walk into that mess.

  2. Ohhh… do you think you can keep it casual with MMM? Men drive me insane. Its like they have this way of showing up at the right/wrong times. And frick, with Bag Buddy, hope that you guys can bring it back to where it should be.

    • At this point, I’ve realized that MMM is never going to be Mr. Right. I mean, maybe not NEVER, but he’ll go forever without contacting me and then blame it on being busy. I’m sure he is, and that’s fine. I’m so busy right now too that I can’t really handle a “legit boyfriend”, unless it was someone that runs in my inner circle anyway (like Bag Buddy). If MMM just wants to hook up, I can deal with that. If he and I talked more, like we did in the beginning, I’d feel differently, but I’ve kinda moved on emotionally anyway.

      And yes, Bag Buddy- that’s going to come back up eventually. We’ll see how it goes.

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