Are You Friggin' Kidding Me?

One Bostonian's Misadventures in Dating

Debating the next move


Alright, so Mini Marky Mark and I had a great date the weekend before New Years. He braved the snow storm to come over for the night. We had talked about him watching The Departed since it is my favorite movie and he had never seen it. He knows my love of Mark Wahlberg (but I haven’t told him that I think they look alike, haha). So he came over, we snuggled and caught up while we watched the movie and had a nice little sleepover.

He ended up not going to our friends’ New Years party, but that’s alright. He texted me at midnight, which was pretty cute.

So on Wednesday I texted him to ask if he wanted to see the new Texas Chainsaw Massacre movie over the weekend, since we talked about going to see it before. He said he wouldn’t be around, that he was going on a mini vacation from Friday-Thursday, but that we could maybe see it the following weekend. Aka- this weekend.

Now I’m at the point of the relationship where I’m lost. I haven’t heard from him since that last text- I didn’t want to bug him during his vacation (I don’t even know where he is, I’m assuming snowboarding somewhere) and we still aren’t at the level where we just have pointless conversations through texts, which is okay by me.

Now, it’s Tuesday. I’m assuming he’s still on his vacation, but I have no idea what I should do. Should I wait for him to call me? Should I send him a “hope you’re having a good vacation!” text tonight/tomorrow? Should I wait until Friday?

I’m actually starting to panic about our “relationship’. Well, not panic, but worry more than I was worrying about it. I really dig this guy. I know, I’ve dug a lot of other guys, too, but this guy and I are really clicking. I know I shouldn’t push our status yet, but when should I do that? Should I bring up the exclusivity chat, or just ask what his deal is?

Gahd, I don’t know what to do.


Author: Jane Champagne

I'm a single late 20s chick, living in Boston. I go on a lot of horrible dates, but some good ones, too.

12 thoughts on “Debating the next move

  1. i think I’d try to wait for him to get back from his trip to text if you haven’t heard from him yet. …ohh and the exclusive talk, thats a tough one that i have yet to figure out how to time right. all i do know is too is sure sends them running if you do it to soon!

    • Yea I know not to have the talk yet, but I also don’t want to waste all my time/effort on this one guy if he’s not like-minded. And I caved, and sent a “hey hope your vacation is going well!” text, ugh. I hope that it’s fairly harmless, haha. I’ll hold off until he messages me back before I send anymore. πŸ™‚

      • I know the feeling. Sometimes I think that I have wasted the last 7 months of time/effort…. ugh. Hope all pans out the right way πŸ™‚

  2. Only women worry about this!! It stinks …. too soon does push them away. But if its going to work you definitely should be ok to send him a text while hes on vacation. πŸ™‚

  3. If you want to contact him… Then do it. :p

  4. Ahhhh this is kinda of what I’m going through with “TOWWETB” at the moment!! It’s crazy how us ladies always worry about stuff like this!! I mean, I think guys too, just in a different way. Anyways, I see from the above comments that you texted him and got a response, which is awesome!! πŸ™‚ I’m glad things are going so well with him!!

    • It’s crazy! I hate this part of dating! haha and yes, he got back to me again tonight so yay! We have to nix plans for this weekend (which actually works out for me) but he suggested a few days during the week, so I’m all sorts of happy right now haha

  5. Glad to hear MMM got back to you.

    Guys DO think about this stuff too. Why hasn’t she responded? Is she even interested? Did I come on too strong when I had my parents drop in on our dinner date? We just don’t let you know that we’re thinking about it because to do so would be unmanly.

    Also, we’re irresponsible and days get away from us easier than they do women. I think if a woman goes three or four days without responding to a message, she’s sending a message of her own. If a man does this, however, he might have just forgotten.

    • All good points. The way I figure, in MMM’s case anyway, I’m pretty sure he’s not into games. He’s a little bit older and doesn’t seem to be interested in all that nonsense (otherwise we would have hooked up when we met…). We’re taking things slow, and that’s perfectly fine. No need to rush something if it’s something that will end up awesome.

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