Are You Friggin' Kidding Me?

One Bostonian's Misadventures in Dating

The Guy Who Just Won’t Give Up


Alright, I know that I get annoyed when I talk to a guy online and then we never meet up. Or when they don’t answer me. However, I usually use the approach “oh, he didn’t answer my message. That sucks.” and move on. I’m pretty good at just cutting people off though (minus the Not-Boyfriend, but that’s a whoooooole other talk), so I guess it’s just easier for me than for others.

This one kid messaged me back in July-August, before I moved to Boston. I had already changed my information on the site so that it said I was moving to Boston in the next week. He seemed okay. However, I met my Not-Boyfriend the first week I moved here, and got caught up in that for awhile. When that ended, I was bummed out and deactivated my account for a few weeks. When I added it back, I honestly didn’t even remember this guy when he started messaging me again. Even though I had reactivated my account, I was so not ready to date anyone else. It’s my own fault for leading him on, I know.

BUT SERIOUSLY. It’s been 6 months. We haven’t met yet. We’re not going to. The second I pop online, he messages me. I hardly am on the site anymore (since the Not-Boyfriend is semi in the picture). I only go on to check messages and to see who checked my profile. In and out. This guy will not quit. A few months ago, he bitched me out because I used to talk to him, but didn’t anymore.

I know I should just tell him to give it up. But at this point, why hasn’t he figured it out? I haven’t messaged him back at all in months. Dude, you’re just looking desperate now.


Author: Jane Champagne

I'm a single late 20s chick, living in Boston. I go on a lot of horrible dates, but some good ones, too.

6 thoughts on “The Guy Who Just Won’t Give Up

  1. Guys are such fucking hypocrites, they get all pissed when you freak out on them for not calling back or whatever, but when it’s the other way around, they expect you to call and freak out when you aren’t talking to them!!! They’re never happy!!

    • No. This one desperate guy should not cast aspersions on my whole gender.

      • Agreed, but this is EVERY guy I’ve ever dated as well…and believe me sweetie, that’s a LOT of men. I’m not trying to generalize, but when the percentage from my own personal experience is at a high, it’s hard not to…

    • Maybe I misinterpreted. EVERY guy you’ve dated “freaks out” on you for not calling them but gets pissed when you “freak out” on them for not talking to you enough? “Freak out” is a strong term for me, and maybe it just means something different (less) to you. Or you’ve just dated a bunch of hypocrite, borderline bipolar guys. Which would be unlucky. And suck.

      • I don’t think you’ll ever understand what I mean, due to the differences between the male and female minds. Nothing wrong with that, it’s just how our brains work. The fact that you’re completely misinterpreting everything is tangible proof. So instead of trying to understand it, just let it go and accept that it’s something only another girl can understand. =)

  2. Sounds like he wants an ‘on-line girlfriend’ and where she lives in the www is not important, he probably would never have met you in person (be thankful for that).

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